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@Rogue_Berserker I'll answer you but keep in mind that I now have you blocked for continuing to be a low-information sheep.

At least half an hour. You should have questions for the coach just as the coach should have questions ready for you. Rule number one of finding the right coach is that you don't choose. The coach chooses you. If you don't feel like you're being chosen by the coach, you're on the wrong track. That is all.

@Rogue_Berserker I'll answer you but keep in mind that I now have you blocked for continuing to be a low-information sheep. At least half an hour. You should have questions for the coach just as the coach should have questions ready for you. Rule number one of finding the right coach is that you don't choose. The coach chooses you. If you don't feel like you're being chosen by the coach, you're on the wrong track. That is all.

@Mindgames2026 said ^

Rule number one of finding the right coach is that you don't choose. The coach chooses you. If you don't feel like you're being chosen by the coach, you're on the wrong track.

That might be how it works in the movies. Among champions who coach professional chess players, something like that might also happen. Among ordinary people, it doesn't work like that. A coach is normally willing to coach whoever is willing to pay, pretty much like any other profession such as dentists, doctors, car mechanics, electricians, tutors, personal trainers, etc.

Having been a coach for a world champion can give the coach a career. That's why a coach can be interested in coaching a very promising young chess player. This is not relevant for ordinary people rated below 2000.

@Mindgames2026 said [^](/forum/redirect/post/c889web9) > Rule number one of finding the right coach is that you don't choose. The coach chooses you. If you don't feel like you're being chosen by the coach, you're on the wrong track. That might be how it works in the movies. Among champions who coach professional chess players, something like that might also happen. Among ordinary people, it doesn't work like that. A coach is normally willing to coach whoever is willing to pay, pretty much like any other profession such as dentists, doctors, car mechanics, electricians, tutors, personal trainers, etc. Having been a coach for a world champion can give the coach a career. That's why a coach can be interested in coaching a very promising young chess player. This is not relevant for ordinary people rated below 2000.

@Rogue_Berserker Typical answer from a low-information sheep with no concept of how to find the RIGHT coach, only any coach. In other news, I'm pretty sure you think the world is flat when that theory was disproved more than 500 years ago.

@Rogue_Berserker Typical answer from a low-information sheep with no concept of how to find the RIGHT coach, only any coach. In other news, I'm pretty sure you think the world is flat when that theory was disproved more than 500 years ago.

There is no point in criticizing anybody. When you spoke with the woman in question (the coach), you got an example of how it works in reality. She knows a lot more about chess than you do. She probably also knows a lot more than you about how coaching works in the real world. You can learn from that. Learn how it works. You seem to be sure that you know better than her. Where do you get that idea from? What makes you so sure that you understand more than her about these things? You think you know better than me as well.

Let's try to avoid misunderstandings. What do you want from a coach? Do you have any goals, like higher rating or learning something specific, like a specific opening? Or are you in it for the fun of playing chess against a coach? What is it that you are looking for?

There is no point in criticizing anybody. When you spoke with the woman in question (the coach), you got an example of how it works in reality. She knows a lot more about chess than you do. She probably also knows a lot more than you about how coaching works in the real world. You can learn from that. Learn how it works. You seem to be sure that you know better than her. Where do you get that idea from? What makes you so sure that you understand more than her about these things? You think you know better than me as well. Let's try to avoid misunderstandings. What do you want from a coach? Do you have any goals, like higher rating or learning something specific, like a specific opening? Or are you in it for the fun of playing chess against a coach? What is it that you are looking for?

"... Ask the instructor if he gives a discount for multiple lessons, but don’t commit until after a lesson or two, to make sure such an investment is wise. ... During your first lesson or two, issues of discussion should include expectations, goals, and how you feel about methods of getting to those goals. ..." - Finding A Good Instructor by NM Dan Heisman (2002)
https://web.archive.org/web/20140627082829/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/heisman21.pdf
By the way, ~26 hours ago, this discussion struck an iceberg and began sinking. As I write this, there are already 18 discussions above this one in the topic list.

"... Ask the instructor if he gives a discount for multiple lessons, but don’t commit until after a lesson or two, to make sure such an investment is wise. ... During your first lesson or two, issues of discussion should include expectations, goals, and how you feel about methods of getting to those goals. ..." - Finding A Good Instructor by NM Dan Heisman (2002) https://web.archive.org/web/20140627082829/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/heisman21.pdf By the way, ~26 hours ago, this discussion struck an iceberg and began sinking. As I write this, there are already 18 discussions above this one in the topic list.

@kindaspongey That does not bother me as I categorically disagree with Mr. Heisman. The interview needs to take place BEFORE a single lesson is offered. The RIGHT coach will know from the interview who needs to be told to move along and who can be chosen for coaching. The first rule of finding a coach is that you don't choose. You can choose who to reach out to, but the coach chooses you, and that's why a preliminary interview is mandatory for finding the right coach.

@Rogue_Berserker There is no point in saying anything else to me unless you know of a coach who will interview each and every potential student for fit before offering a single lesson. You're not listening when I tell you that when it comes to finding the RIGHT coach, you only get to choose who to reach out to. The coach chooses you, and (s)he does that with an extensive interview first to ensure that you're a fit for each other. Look up ChessMood's blog on how to find the RIGHT chess coach and you'll see why I'm out of the market of the foreseeable future.

@kindaspongey That does not bother me as I categorically disagree with Mr. Heisman. The interview needs to take place BEFORE a single lesson is offered. The RIGHT coach will know from the interview who needs to be told to move along and who can be chosen for coaching. The first rule of finding a coach is that you don't choose. You can choose who to reach out to, but the coach chooses you, and that's why a preliminary interview is mandatory for finding the right coach. @Rogue_Berserker There is no point in saying anything else to me unless you know of a coach who will interview each and every potential student for fit before offering a single lesson. You're not listening when I tell you that when it comes to finding the RIGHT coach, you only get to choose who to reach out to. The coach chooses you, and (s)he does that with an extensive interview first to ensure that you're a fit for each other. Look up ChessMood's blog on how to find the RIGHT chess coach and you'll see why I'm out of the market of the foreseeable future.

@jovana51796 said ^

@Mindgames2026 I remember our brief interaction. To clarify: it's entirely my choice whether I offer trial lessons or not, and I have a process that works well for me and for the students I coach. The way I run my coaching business is my decision, just as you have the right to look for whatever approach fits you best.

It seems our expectations simply didn't match, and that's okay. I hope you've found someone who's a better fit for what you're looking for.

As for the idea that I wanted your wallet. I once coached a student for over six months before realizing I had forgotten to send any invoices at all. His mother had to ask me how much they owed. That's how much I care about money.

A likely story. You're just covering up the fact that you don't know how to interview a potential client beforehand to ensure that a fit exists, and you know it. Idiots like you who think the earth is flat and don't know the importance of screening each and every potential student are why finding the RIGHT coach, instead of ANY coach, is a headache for those of us who are/were serious about finding one.

If you had functioning brain cells, held the preliminary interview, and told me to move along, I would have felt a lot better about doing so because I would have felt that you were treating me seriously and still felt like you weren't the one. That would have been fine, because it would have sent the message that there was no bullshit about you. Turns out there is plenty of bullshit about you since you don't know what being a professional coach really means.

Not having an interview also sends the message that I can't trust you. The right coach will insist on said interview and expect the potential client to have questions for the potential coach about what their style and how they treat situations where the student just can't wrap their heads around a concept. Some of us are reluctant to lower our guard about those kinds of questions if you're not willing to grill us about where we are in our journey first.

You need to think about the implications of that before you consider looking for your next client (who won't be me).

@jovana51796 said [^](/forum/redirect/post/9146XWuG) > @Mindgames2026 I remember our brief interaction. To clarify: it's entirely my choice whether I offer trial lessons or not, and I have a process that works well for me and for the students I coach. The way I run my coaching business is my decision, just as you have the right to look for whatever approach fits you best. > > It seems our expectations simply didn't match, and that's okay. I hope you've found someone who's a better fit for what you're looking for. > > As for the idea that I wanted your wallet. I once coached a student for over six months before realizing I had forgotten to send any invoices at all. His mother had to ask me how much they owed. That's how much I care about money. A likely story. You're just covering up the fact that you don't know how to interview a potential client beforehand to ensure that a fit exists, and you know it. Idiots like you who think the earth is flat and don't know the importance of screening each and every potential student are why finding the RIGHT coach, instead of ANY coach, is a headache for those of us who are/were serious about finding one. If you had functioning brain cells, held the preliminary interview, and told me to move along, I would have felt a lot better about doing so because I would have felt that you were treating me seriously and still felt like you weren't the one. That would have been fine, because it would have sent the message that there was no bullshit about you. Turns out there is plenty of bullshit about you since you don't know what being a professional coach really means. Not having an interview also sends the message that I can't trust you. The right coach will insist on said interview and expect the potential client to have questions for the potential coach about what their style and how they treat situations where the student just can't wrap their heads around a concept. Some of us are reluctant to lower our guard about those kinds of questions if you're not willing to grill us about where we are in our journey first. You need to think about the implications of that before you consider looking for your next client (who won't be me).

@Mindgames2026 said in #66:

@kindaspongey That does not bother me as I categorically disagree with Mr. Heisman. The interview needs to take place BEFORE a single lesson is offered. ...

I am not sure, because I have not read the article in a while, but I do not remember NM Heisman opposing a “preliminary interview”.

@Mindgames2026 said in #66: > @kindaspongey That does not bother me as I categorically disagree with Mr. Heisman. The interview needs to take place BEFORE a single lesson is offered. ... I am not sure, because I have not read the article in a while, but I do not remember NM Heisman opposing a “preliminary interview”.

@kindaspongey That part I can respect. But it's personal principle, if I'm ever in the market for a coach again, that a preliminary interview take place first without exception. The RIGHT coach would insist on it anyway. If that principle bothers you, there are others we can violate not related to chess that are fair game.

@kindaspongey That part I can respect. But it's personal principle, if I'm ever in the market for a coach again, that a preliminary interview take place first without exception. The RIGHT coach would insist on it anyway. If that principle bothers you, there are others we can violate not related to chess that are fair game.

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