Is it normal to be shouted at by parents after losing at chess?

• Just now i was told that i am doing this on purpose because i want to go home faster

• i was told that i have no interest in playing the rest of tournament.

• I was being confirmed that i will lose tomorrow as well because i lost 2 rounds in a row.

• They dont understand the effort someone puts in thwir game.

• if i lost, i dont need fucking captionless screenshots telling me where i had -1.48 advantage and i lost.

• i dont need to be fucking told that i dont know how to convert advantage when i mistook the wrong exchange.

• i dont want to be fucking told gibberish by someone who thinks he knows a lot about chess when in reality watching the engine is all he does.

• i hate how my parents have zero tolerance to a loss. They are the same hypocritics that say "we dont compare our son" when they just now yelled how that thirteen year old is 2200 rated.

• I cannot believe i have to survive these for my rest of life too.

• they secretly said that i am a coward when i lost to a 2090.... i saw it.

• (You might know my age by now)

• THEY DID NOT MENTION HOW I MISSED AN ADVANTAGE 2 GAMES AGO, BECAUSE I WON THAT GAME.

• THEY SAID I WILL LOSE TOMORROW ALSO.

• THEY THINK I SHOULD NEVER BE DOING BLUNDERS AND LOSING 2 IN A ROW JUST BECAUSE I SPENT 2 MONTHS PREPARING

what do you think? Should i beat myself everytime the eval drops? Is this normal? Not for me. I am having a "try not to cry" challenge right now.

'Most players do not like losing, and consider defeat as something shameful. This is a wrong attitude. Those who wish to perfect themselves must regard their losses as lessons and learn from them what sorts of things to avoid in the future.' Capablanca

@tpr said ^

'Most players do not like losing, and consider defeat as something shameful. This is a wrong attitude. Those who wish to perfect themselves must regard their losses as lessons and learn from them what sorts of things to avoid in the future.' Capablanca

I wish someone explained this shit to them...

He was one of the best players of all time, they should accept it from him.

@Himawari_Nohara said ^

Just now i was told that i am doing this on purpose because i want to go home faster

They cant know better than you

@Himawari_Nohara said ^

i was told that i have no interest in playing the rest of tournament.

Again, you are the only one that could know this if it was true

@Himawari_Nohara said ^

I was being confirmed that i will lose tomorrow as well because i lost 2 rounds in a row.

Horrible motivation
This just feeds tilting

@Himawari_Nohara said ^

(You might know my age by now)

I can make an educated guess based on a point you made earlier

@Himawari_Nohara said ^

THEY THINK I SHOULD NEVER BE DOING BLUNDERS AND LOSING 2 IN A ROW JUST BECAUSE I SPENT 2 MONTHS PREPARING

Blunders are unavoidable, and it is good to make them as long as you calmly analyse them, learn from them, and never make them again

@Himawari_Nohara said ^

Should i beat myself everytime the eval drops? Is this normal?

No.

@tpr said ^

He was one of the best players of all time, they should accept it from him.

They think capablanca is a passive endgame player and consider positional chess as weak. You can imagine now.

@lq2 said ^

Blunders are unavoidable, and it is good to make them as long as you calmly analyse them, learn from them, and never make them again

My blunders are stamped on a wall as 'illness'. Talked about for weeks.

ouch I'm so sorry, I must say I had to go through some similar shit back when I played competitively.. at least ur parents check the engine mine wouldn't even do that fah
and you're still at least having a high rating T-T I was stuck at like 1400 FIDE for so long and still am btw it's just that I stopped playing IRL tourneys and chess in general for a while

I really can empathize with the not-caring-about-actual-wins part, my mom would keep saying that they're flukes if they're like big wins and say that I'd lose like a million games after that and it just got to my head and I'd actually lose them no matter how hard I wanted to prove her wrong
so I was just tilted af and I still don't get how much of a failure I was to be stuck at 14-smth FIDE after being given so much time and resources, coach, etc. even after having had played for like 3 years.. I bet I wouldn't be feeling this way rn if my parents were a little less comparing (LOOK AT THAT DUDE FROM YOUR ACADEMY HE'S SO GOOD; LOOK THAT THAT GIRL SHE'S LIKE 4 YEARS YOUNGER THAN YOU AND SHE'S 1800+; LOOK AT HIM HE HAS PLAYED CHESS FOR LESSER TIME THAN YOU YOU'RE STILL STUCK HERE) and I think I lost a lot of my love for chess cuz of this

so just trust your chess skills you can do this! give your best, I know that never really worked for me but hey just try and maybe you'll prove them wrong someday :) I do hope they're not like abusive in non-verbal ways, verbal sucks enough fah

I am a 2000-2100 rated chess player and i know what i am mistaking.

@SolangeloForever said ^

I do hope they're not like abusive in non-verbal ways,

Unfortunately, sometimes......

They dont realize that i spend these nights greiving silently while they think i am sleeping. I today was also told that i dont sleep even after tries because i am tensed by tournament and have no motivation.

They dont know that i am not able to sleep at night because i have a dream which i feel is coming closer with each game... the cm title. I feel i am very close to it.

After countless shouting they make me forget my dreams and manifest that i will lose everything instead.